soo...im postin this up for the second time...xanga didn't like me the first time..and erased everything!! *shakin fist at xanga*...

 

anyways...its been a while since i've updated...almost a month..let's see...im out of school now! finals done and over with =0t...settled with a 3.02 GPA...=0t...but its ok...so overall my berkeley GPA is 3.44 ...so im still in good standin for mech E....but ill have a busy summer ahead of me...

 

first thing i did was visited friends...

 

let's start off with reg and viv in frisco...me and stant took bart there bout hella early o clock to glenn park where viv picked us up...went to reg's house and played video games for a while....then headed out to lunch down the street..that's sooooo cool reg!!! i wish i had a mini chinatown down the block where i can get jook at 2 in the mornin =0t...then we umm...ummm....went back....then headed out to another part of frisco..downtown was it?....bowled a bit...WE ALL SUCK!! but the pictures were awesome!!....and it was really fun...then we walked around...frisco is really beautiful (outside of chinatown)...hehe..and took some more pics of the ladies...then headed out for dinner at the cheesecake factory...the girls timed it perfectly cuz we beat the crowd...i got a monster burger...=0t...and it really was a monster burger...i couldn't finish it....it was man versus beast...and i lost....there goes my manhood...i got it bagged and it was gonna be "shiew yeh!"....we went back to watch the Last Samurai on reg's projector!! gosh it was gorgeous.....buttercourse! we played at least an hour of smashbro on the gamecube on dang...it must have been 70" screen/wall...lol...i want a projector now...*sniff sniff.....me and stant left on bart...caught the last train b4 bart closed up...and got home....

 

next morning...me and stant head over to erin's house...and we go to visit Colin in DAVIS!!! MOOoOoOooOoOooOo!!....its actually not that far...closer than u think....we got there in 1.5 hours..and mr colin had everything planned out for us...we got some grub...visited peeps like joe..becky..tiffi...ran into raymond...people like that..hehe..he then gave us a tour of the davis campus....and he brought us into the ARC ....the Activities and recreation center?...kinda like CAL's rsf....cept bigger ...better...and more technologically advanced..!!...its hella nice...and colin works there!!!...we were gonna see the moo moo's....but when we got closer...i changed my mind for obvious reasons.......we dropped by Colin's house....HIS house...in SOUTH DAVIS..(RICH BOY!!!!)....to see his dad for a bit...isn't that great tho? boy doesn't have to look for a place to live next year...he has a HOUSE!!...anyways...we went to watch colin play hockey...it was a good game...7-0...UC davis whooped ass...then my dad was right...it did rain in davis...haha...but we made it back to colin's house...where me erin stant and colin had a sleep over...and all slept in the same room....(bad idea since i was snoring!...lol....i was SUPER tired from the day b4 ok!).....then next morning we headed back for UC....end of a wonderful visit to davis...so glad my lil sis is goin there....all the more reason to visit...

 

then next up....is Heidi So in pleasanton! which is HECKA FAR AWAY!!...i had to transfer at bayfair to get there...but it was fun...their in and out isn't as good as UC's...but its the company that counts...viv and reg got on a later train..so i took a nap on the benches outside of the bart station waitin for heidi...then we went to lunch...then went back to her HUGE house...passed by whatshisfacethatdoesthefootballannouncingstuff madden's house....couldn't see anything cuz he has a fat wall surround it...he prolly knew i was coming...*glare*....then we walked around the hills with the nice weather...warm breeze...and gentle sun....then reg's bladder called and we went back inside....bathed in Onkyo surround sound as we faught each other in Dead or Alive 3? for XBOX.....it was fun...and some of them fighter chicks looked pretty good...hahah...around 3ish...we hit the pool....but not b4 we turned on the WATERFALL of course!! ...oh i forgot!! her backyard used to be part of a regional park!! ITS BIG!! great for hide and seek...scary if ur home alone....and itchy if u don't like the outdoors......back to the pool!...pool was complete with spa and waterfall..and 3 ladies =0)....we took only a couple of pictures...but they were calender worthy .....we were in the pool for a couple of hours...we all came out pruny...hehe...in my case...i came out with a couple of scratches...and viv's hand prints on my back..(for a lil while)....but my ol' my....3 girls in swim suits ...wet....under a waterfall...I TOOK THAT PICTURE!!!....$5 a piece? ill start taking orders now!....then we got out ....grubbed on Mountain Mike's pizza...and headed back...on bart.....a drunkie who jus got out of jail...jus happened to meet another jail bird...and dude handed him another bottle and some ciggies...wth?!...then dude took a couple sips...told us that we're actually in 117 wars! and that reg is gonna be the president..and im gonna b the secretary of treasury.......lol...i wouldn't mind....but man was he F'ed up....anyways....im jus glad he got off with me at bayfair...so the girls had a safer ride home...and i transfered to fremont...and walked to logan...i caught the last 8 minutes of Festive Dances?...i dunno what they played...but it was powerful...soloistic....and not the band i left behind...mr B has done a great job...and CONGRATS to my lil dora on making first chair of the clarinets...and good luck to TeaBag leadin the flutes...and teddy and the saxes ...and ted and the lower reeds....next year in Scotland! u guys better carry the woodwinds! i felt so at home being in the little theater again...surrounded by the people i've spent the best times of my HS years with....its where i belong...whereas @ CAL...im still findin my place...=0t...there truly is no other band experience..BUT the James Logan band experience.....that night i got more hugs than i did the whole year....it was great to see everyone doin so well...

 

and that concluded my day yesterday...today i jus slept...and cooked for anna.....and after that...i've been at home...sittin here....with enough time to type this post TWICE...stupid xanga...it better post this time...

 

oh yeah! for the one and only chicken little...*hug* (i miss ya buddy!).....this is for her....COME TO THE LOGAN FIELD SHOW EVERYONE!! NOVEMBER 14th!!....

 

that's all folks! =0)..

 

no wait!! gotta keep up with the previous post...

 

hmMmMmm...I AM....a person always running...i busy myself to keep from thinkin about things...stress is what keeps me goin...i don't stop to smell the roses...i dunno why i run or what i run from....but i've noticed this about myself...i am constantly running...even when i don't need to be busy...i work...sign up for more classes...work out or clean...jus to keep from being idle...i wonder what i'll realize when i sit too long and think too much...i sat a lot today....but i was chattin most of the time...mr ryan says im runnin from myself....mayb he's right....

 

I AM NOT....uhhh....a playa? lol....j/k....I AM NOT a good friend...=0t...sadly its true...if anyone's known me for a long time...they know i suck at keep in touch...its usually people who call me...or IM me....mayb its my memory...but that's no excuse...i need to make a change to all this....i think im gettin better tho....cuz im still in touch with HS peeps...but old friends i need to see and visit....heh....i also need to work on remembering new friends too...(sorry bout that heidi)...<~~~ i forgot that girl's name for a second....and she got me into thinkin she cried!! MEANiE!!...anyhooo....have patience friends...change takes time..and john is slow...so it'll take a lot of time for this ol' man to change....

 

things to still do this summer...

 

learn guitar...

play with Betsy..1..2..3..and polish them...

catch up with E36..Statics!

Get fit again!

Draw one poster

Take Calc 3...4...and English 101B...

 

 

well i jus got back from upstairs and watchin league of extraordinary gentlemen again....still a good movie...kinda overdone in some parts...but overall..i enjoyed it...

 

anyways...hmmm...i haven't posted in a while...trying to get finals done and all....so i got business over with...now i only have math and physics left...

 

but to keep up with my previous post...hmmm...

 

i am a guy who notices a female's scent....its definately a head-turner for me...that also goes for the way they carry themselves...kinda like how u can "smell" fear...(that's what they said in the movie i jus watched)....confident and independant women carry themselves differently...and girls with personality jus smell differently too...=0).....

 

hmmm...i am not ummm...an outgoin guy i think.......so far this year...i think i've been very anti-social...i've barely gotten outside of the little group i hang out with...im not one to go around meeting people...and even after i do...i don't say hi if i see them...and if i do a couple times....i forget them the next couple times...that's horrible huh?...i dunno.....i still consider myself shy....tho medina says im "bubbly"...but that may only be true after u know me....for those who don't...they may never willl...i dunno if this is a good thing....or if its a bad thing....but i think i've closed up a lot my first college year...i wonder why.....

 

anyways....so hmm...what else....WE RESERVED THE BACH!! yay!! so we now will have a place to stay after we get all the paper work done..but its our's for the next five days!!! YAY!!!...=0)....

 

hmmm..what else?....i dunno...ill tell u next time....

 

thanks to those who still keep up with my life..CHICKEN LITTLE!!

sooo...its been a while..

 

hmm...i've been thinkin...instead of all this "self discovery" that im supposed to be goin through in college...im jus stressed bout gettin into my major...so i might as well do somethin bout it in my xanga...

 

so since i don't post anymore...how bout i jus post a lil something bout myself every entry....it'll be better than nothin....

 

we can start with who i am....or who i think i am....better yet...let's start with what im not...

 

hmm....im not one to actively participate in political events or conversations...why?....cuz i don't really care for it...tho i've learned that i should because every vote does count ...and in a world where so much goes wrong...(look at the governor)...its people like me that let this happen....im sorry =0t...

 

hmmm...i am....however one that umm...i dunno...haha...well...here's the obvious...i am definately one who will sit my lazy ass at home and jus watch movies...of late ...it seems im always watchin by myself..even when i have company...i still feel alone...i dunno...mayb its the weather....

 

i realize im really foolish...gullible...i believe a lot of what others say....and i believe myself sometimes....even tho im lying to myself at times...doesn't make sense huh?...doesn't make sense to me neither...i tell myself im happy and single ...here at cal....finishin off the rest of the year....but am i?......days aren't bad....i've prayed a couple of times...jus to thank god for a great year....but something is always lackin....i dunno what it is....and even tho my friends say im constantly surrounded by girls....(its not true!!)....i still feel amazingly lonely...but i do have some great times with my friends upstairs and across....they help me pass the day when my roomie is at war with his computer...or when he's doin his weird things...so thanks to u guys...u know who u r.....

 

my head hurts...i should catch up on sleep...

 

and i wanna give a shoutout to all those new folks that i've met recently that i've been keepin in touch with...=0)

 

also...i miss my kids..=0t...Oases was soo fun...and the dinner was awesome...soooo funny and memorable....GO GO POWER RANGERS!!.....if any of the cords r readin this...thanks for everything....i look forward to the comin semester and continuin to be a part of this great program =0)...

 

that's all folks !

 

OH YEAH!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY STANTON AND VICTORIA!! =0)

well...by popular demand...i must update this thing....

 

first off....let me get the yucky side out of me..

 

askjdf;klajsdf;lakjsdf;lakjs;ksafFUCK FUCK FUCK asdfja;lskfdja;skjfd;laskjdf;alkjsf;laskjdfa;ksjdf;aFUCK FUCK!!.....ahhHH!!!!!!...ok im done....

 

=0)...anyways....what can i say bout the past week?...gosh its flown by...

 

pretty much like my life....as mr ryan has put it...i've spent so much time running in my life...keepin myself busy with summer school every summer....hw...clubs...AP's...honors....that i've never stopped to smell the roses or flowers...and more importantly...i've never really stopped to reflect and look back and see what i've been through...who i've become...

 

and i guess....midterms r jus a part of life...didn't do so well...for those of u who don't know....business...i got a 67%...physics i got a 43%...and math i got a 72%.....sad huh?...well...grades r jus grades...but what really pisses me off.....or actually....im not mad...jus really really confused...which then makes me mad....cuz i dunno what the f*ck in doin in college anymore...i feel so pressured to decide a major...and its like once i decide...i can't change it..(college of engineerin regulations)....so its like im being force into a cookie cutter to become jus like the rest....=0t...i dunno what i want anymore...

 

but one thing i did learn from seaton....u can first define urself, who u r ....by who ur not....and this week...has been awesome regardless of grades and midterms...i've met so many wonderful people....its jus a good feelin yenno? when u meet someone...and u click?...im not talkin bout one in particular....but a whole group! even better huh?!...hehe...

 

i really dunno how to describe that feelin....it really makes or breaks ur day....the people ur around....the energy they emanate...i guess mr ryan described it the best....some people jus have an energy that coincides or is in harmony with ur very own...and its a great feelin...with them...u feel like ur glowin...whereas...with others....its jus awkward....the dreaded dissonance of seconds or half steps...its GROSS!! (like my roommate)...and its not like he's a bad person...its jus...me and him really dun get along...

 

*sigh....and sad news this week too....my grand aunt died....my parents r goin to handle all that in LA this friday...=0(...i guess its a good thing...she's lived a long long life....=*....what hurts the most is that she didn't even remember me when i went to visit her in the summer.....gone so senile she didn't even remember her own family....i remember when she used to take greyhound all by herself from LA to frisco...jus to come visit us....strong lil chinese woman...barely spoke english....but she made it somehow......but twisted fate had turned her into .i don't even know.....i couldn't stop crying when i saw her...she seriously didn't remember any of us.....and what's even more fucked up is her own damn son put her in an old folk's hospital...so they can watch over her....i swear...i will never do that to my parents....i dunno...jus so fucked up why things like this have to happen to old people...i really dun get it sometimes...life seems so unfair....i can't help but cry...i really miss her....

 

but as for today....(trying to get on a brighter note)...dinner was shitty...(not workin).....but i did spend a couple hours...meetin new people...."studyin"....playing ping pong....and really jus letttin myself go for the week...completely jus openin up...and breathin in the world...it was a great feelin....after a fresh breath of air....i jus sang my heart out...felt great...really felt great....

 

as for now....i dunno....i've met a lot of people online too....this facebook thing is pretty kool....helpin me network and all...me and stant still need to find a place...but first...we need to find out if he got his job at the RCC....then boat dance is tomorrow...i wonder how that will be....but no doubt...ill will try to have a blast...and if not...a cruise is always nice......hmm...but yeah...a lot of great people...that's all i gotta say....some cultured....some tall....some short....some intellectual....some dirty....haha....jus SOME!...anyways...

 

its gettin late..my life is a mess...sorry yall had to read this....i guess it jus all came out....im not insane...hehe....jus a lil cooped up....

 

*sigh...i really need to find myself sometime tho...if only i could jus pick up a flyer when i pass by sather gate and on it was my identity....life would be soo much easier....

 

hmm....a good song in my head right now is.....

Frank Sinatra - Young at Heart.....for my grand aunt.....who taught me the bitterness of coffee and age....